Monday, November 2, 2015

#30DayWritingChallenge: Your First Heart Break


photo courtesy of www.fanpop.com


   I've only had a couple of boyfriends but it's a bit funny now to look back that I got my first heartbreak from a guy who is not my boyfriend.
     Several years ago, there's this gay forum site where I log in. There are different sections for health, pop culture, literature, etc. I mostly went to the trivia and word game sites to just play and not really hook up. There was this one guy who I constantly played with on one of the word games. Things escalated and he asked me to meet him. We met around my area and walked around and just basically talked. Before leaving he kissed me and asked if we could see each other again 
     We met each other again. We ate and decided to go his place. Over the course of several months he showed me what an adult relationship is. The catch was, we were never an item. He told me that he slept with a couple of guys while dating and told me that he'll try to be exclusive with me. But that was quickly forgotten.
     During my time with the guy, I got to go to different places, meet different people, read different books. Everything was perfect except for our status. 
     On the day that we 'broke up' I cried all the way from Makati to Manila. I was so shattered that I couldn't see myself as person. My whole existence was wiped out. 
      I resented the whole thing but at the same time I patterned my next relationships with I had with the guy. I became matured and treated all my past boyfriends as partners. Equals. 
      As much as it pains me to recount the whole thing, if it weren't for the guy, I don't think I'd be a better partner for my boyfriend.
       Plus we're friends. That's one less person on my kill list. Kidding of course. 

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