Incision and Drainage

photo courtesy of www.chefreinvented.com

     I rant a lot. Probably more than I should. Especially back when I was at my old job. It was my way of dealing the stress brought about my work. I barely remember the times when I just held it in or dea lt with it besides going on full verbal diarrhea mode. But over the years, I have slowly learned to channel that energy into dealing with the things I'm frustrated with. Though they might not always work or have the outcome that I want, it made me less ranty and more mindful of how I am when I'm dealing with a very stressful situation. 

     Working from home still has its challenges and could be as toxic as an office environment, but since I've learned to channel my frustrations, I have handled it better and made me a better listener at least to the nearest person ranting about their day.

     I've known Allan to be a patient and understanding man especially at work. Though he does not tolerate stupidity and inefficiency, he will be the first one to address the problem at hand and will look for long term solutions. And I'm envious at him for having this kind of foresight and resolve. Today was a different thought. He came on late from work and went to vent about certain issues right off the bat. I have learned ago to not go head-to-head with him and just listen to him until finishes. When he had finished I offered a couple of suggestions to him and asked if it was really the reason for his frustrations. Even at the height of his exasperation, he still knew what he needed to do and just wanted someone to unload his rants to. 

     For some, it might seem that I might be taking a lot by taking on his vents and it could be detrimental to me. I love the guy and I will continue to absorb his frustrations and fears and put into good use. That's what you do to the people you love. 

Look Back

photo courtesy of www.ebay.com

     The last two weeks of February tested my overall perspective on how people really view and I how people. Add to that my concern for my laptop's mobility issues. While I was relieved to find out about how my friends really feel about the LGBT community, I was somewhat disappointed to find out that some people who I've considered as family look at the community I belong to as somewhat inferior. It was painful to accept, that you are only relevant, you are only appreciated when you are being useful to them. And not because you are a human being that should be treated with equal dignity and respect. 

     What I did not expect was my parents lack of disgust towards these people. Probably because they're not directly affected,and that it's hard for them to put themselves in my place. Maybe because I was expecting that they will tell me words of encouragement and show me that I am not something inferior in their eyes. These thoughts had me doubting if they really accepted who I am. That's something I had to work through. Up until now.

     It pains me to write this because save for Allan, my family is the only unit that I hold dear in my heart. I grew up knowing how close we are. But I love them. And love will always win. Always. 

Because He Needs Us

photo courtesy of www.usapost.org

     Looks like Manny Pacquiao got the biggest punch of his life. During an interview, he was asked about same-sex marriage and he compared it to how animals do it. I think everyone has read the interview and has seen the video so we'll skip the blow-by-blow account. After receiving a barrage of punches from different social media users, Pacquiao has uploaded an apology video for his statement. It is important to note though, he still thinks that a homosexual act is still a sin.

     I'll skip all the counter arguments that Pacquiao made about the LGBT community since there are so many people who are qualified to do that. What I would like to get off my chest is the level of inhuman thinking that came out of this statement. Not only did he degrade the LGBT community but is also perpetuating homophobia under the guise of religion. Since he's also running for a Senate seat, it is not surprising that he'll say something this low. Not only did make it relevant but him uploading an apology video only hours after the social media backlash shows that this is a calculated move. The apology insincere video projects an image that he listens if he is on the wrong and he's willing to humble himself. 

     Like as if that would work. Surprisingly, it might will. Pacquiao is not really known for his legislative skills and attendance but crafting this election given our predilection to forget the wrong doings of these bastards (the Marcoses, anyone?) might just get him elected. 

     It is up to the voters that understands the situation to turn this around. You don't have to campaign for the ones you like, but you can campaign against for those that only uses hot button issues to be the center of social media frenzy.  

   

Wired Heart

photo courtesy of www.wallpaperspal.com

     I decided to ask Allan out to have a breakfast date. It was also Valentine's Day yesterday. It was a fun date. It took a more corporate feel as talked about goals and other things about our relationship. This approach has worked for us since it allows us to be less emotional and look at it in a more logical way. Even during misunderstandings, we've dealt with it by going on a more business-like handling. This might sound boring for you, especially from someone who is in relationship.

     Tachikoma, my laptop is still not fixed. The wireless function is still not working and I'm still tied to hooking it up in a router with an ethernet cable. It's a bit limiting since I tend to move around the house while working. Now it feels like being in an office work desk. 

    Hopefully, I'll get the time this week to have fixed and have back to its working condition. 

#30DayWritingChallenge: A Kiss

photo courtesy of www.sodahead.com

     A kiss is just a kiss is just kiss.

     This is what I would tell myself when I used to make out with different guys. There were times where I could feel what they were feeling at that moment aside from being horny. Other times, I would be clueless as to what they want while kissing.

     There is something about kissing that sends me into different emotions. When I was still single, I would spent a lot of time kissing a guy compared to doing the deed. To me, it felt more intimate, personal. That doesn't work when you're on a one night stand.

     One time I kissed a girl. Not because I wanted to see if I was straight or not, but rather see if there was a difference. There wasn't any difference, but at the same time I didn't feel anything. I wasn't revolted at the what I did. It was more like I know for a fact that I'll never ever get the same satisfaction in kissing girls.

     And no, I'm not ashamed to kiss my man in public. 

#30DayWritingChallenge: An Inanimate Object That's Important To You

     I'm not fond of receiving gifts. Especially from boyfriends.

     But when Allan gave me a watch, it made me appreciate even more. 

     In his defense, he also bought one for himself.

     The watch was one of the first things that meant something to me. It showed that Allan values our time together and he was thinking of me all the time. This may sound like something from a romcom film but this watch was one the reasons why I love him, aside from his other lovely qualities. 

     Whenever we would go out, we ask each other if we're going to wear our couple's watch. We hate couple shirts but love the idea of having something that signifies your being a couple. And this was the best idea. 

#30DayWritingChallenge: Your Father or Mother

     Instead of writing about one of the parental units, I decided to write about both of them.

   

   Female parental unit came from a well-off and mildly influential family. Her earliest memories were of the break down of the her parents' marriage. She and her sister were shipped off to my grandfather's side to live a comfortable life. Unfortunately, it was anything but. Sure, they were well-fed and they had clothes on their back but neither of them felt what it's like to have parental affection. Luckily, their grandparents adored them. Especially female parental unit. 

   

     She was the good girl out of the grand children. The one who would always do the right thing, not for brownie points but because of conviction. She inherited her grandfather's diplomacy and fairness. Sometimes too much of it. Growing up, she didn't know what she wanted in life. She seemed to be contented with what everyone expected her to do. After getting her diploma she stared working and decided to have children. Minus the husband.

   

     Along came male parental unit.

    He was the second of nine children. He came from a poor family. He was never the favorite, but he never resented this. He took on the bulk of the work on the rice field because the eldest brother was sickly. He was used to not getting things he wanted, but that didn't stop him for trying. He was always on the side of good and up till now he'll be the first one to walk away from a fight even if he can break the guy's neck in three places.

   

    One would think that this pairing will not last. With female parental unit's spoiled little rich girl behavior and her penchant to just go along with what life gives her. And then we have male parental unit, with his simple outlook and good boy persona, it sure was a break up waiting to happen.

   

    And yet here they are. Still standing. Both have evolved. Both have become better versions of themselves. They have been through so much hardships, it sometimes baffles me that they still chose to stick it out. 

   

     I wish my own relationship could last that long. 

#30DayWritingChallenge: The Story Behind Your Profile Picture

   This photo was taken when Allan and went to Viking's to celebrate my birthday. I'm not a fan of celebrating my birthday. I felt out of place in the mini-parties that female parental unit organized for me back in grade school. 

     Allan decided not to surprise me because

1. He knew my aversion to celebrating my birthday.
2. I found out about his little plan and spoiled it.
3. He knew he could get to go with telling me in advance 
4. Food. Food. Food.

    A day before our Viking's adventure, I came down with a flu. Upon arriving at our place, I decided to take a cold shower since my fever was running high. Both of us were determined to have our fill even if I was not 100% energy wise.

     

    When we got there the first thing that we did was to pile food on our plates. It was after sitting down and talking about something that Allan remembered to take my birthday picture.

#LoveWins

photo courtesy of twitter.com

   The U.S. Supreme Court has decided that same-sex marriage is legal in 50 states. This is a great news for the advancement of the LGBT rights and finally same-sex couples will have the same benefits as that of married straight couples. It was never about religion. It has always been the upholding of the basic human right be married and have the right of any heteresexual married couple around the world.

   Love wins. Always.